Time to Let Go... And Let God!!!!

That has become my new slogan in life! Just wished I would of adheared to it many years ago, if I had, I probably wouldn't be in the position I'm in now, with a job that keeps me away from home way too much, and bills that make sure I don't get home too often, if you know what I mean.
I made many choices in the past that I wished I would of waited on God a little longer for help on, but patience has never been my strong point! And because of it things are a mess, just as they are for our country's economy! I've been on the road a lot these days trying to fix the mess I've made with finances, but the battle seems to be long and gruelling! But I've learned it's time that I let go of trying to run things in my life my way, and start letting God take the reigns more often.
Actually, I should let him take the reigns all the time, but the selfish prideful side of me tries to grab them from his hands from time to time. The lesson is learned, that my way is not always the right way, and that God's way is always the right way!!! Sometimes his way is very hard, but if you choose his path over your own, you will always come out the other side better off for it!! This is what I've been learning now for almost 40 years.
With that said, it is not always easy to let go, and let God, but I am trying, one day at a time to do just that! Pray for me that I will not be able to grab the reigns from God again, and make a bigger mess out the mess I've already made, LOL. Thanks...

The Perfect Valintine!

Ok, it has been over 10 years now that Teresa and I have been together, and I would have to say this was the best Valintine yet!!! In the past, I made the mistake of getting to comfortable in our marriage, and didn't try enough to show my love to Teresa, but after almost losing her for good this past summer, I realize that I need to Cherish the Love we Have! (just stole that line from Kool and the Gang song, Cherish, which I just happen to be listening to now, LOL).
Seriously, I was in a major funk for a long time when it came to our marriage, and it's funny how something so bad could turn into something so good! Now, I've learned to let Teresa know every day how much she means to me, and I find my love for her growing leaps and bounds the past few months, all because I decided to care again about her, and her feelings.
Now, it seems i can never get enough of her, and miss her terribly when I'm on the road! Before, it was no big deal when I left on a trip for a few days, because I just assumed she always be there, until this past summer she showed me that even she has a breaking point, and I had pushed her to it!
Well, this Valintine was a nervious one for me, because up till then, we still had not re-connected, and was struggling with our relationship, eventhough we both wanted to make it work badly! I tried to make it as perfect as I could for her that night! I choose making her dinner instead of dealing with crowds at crowded restraunts, My daughter, Chelsea, helped me decorate the dinning room, and Hotel room, to make it special, and everything seemed perfect!
But have to say, even with all the effort put in, the ice between us was still frozen solid! But something happened that night at the Hotel, something I can't really explain. All I know is we were struggling to connect, and while talking about it, something just snapped, and it was as if the Ice wall shattered all at once, and we was as close as we ever was!!! It was great! I thought I would never get that closeness with my wife again, but thanks to all the prayers, I feel God said enough was enough, and not melted the ice wall between us, but shattered it!!! Since then our relationship, I feel, has grown stronger, and the closeness is back!!! Thank you all for your prayers!! God is Good all the time!!!!!!!!

The Parking Lot in the Middle of the road...

Or it could also be the side's of the road... I have often traveled through Iowa after they have had some kind of winter storm and have always seen more cars and trucks stuck off the road in the midian, or on the sides of the highway, than you usually would after any storm in any other state!!!
I mean, when ever bad wheather hits, you know there will always be a handful of idiots that think they are bullet proof, or at least snow/ice proof , that will end up sliding off the highway due to driving to fast for conditions, but in Iowa, the number of idiots that slide off the Highway is way more than you find in any other state!!!
I often wonder why this was untill tonight. I was unfortunate enough to have to drive through a heavy snow storm tonight through Iowa, on my way to Shelby, IA. The snow was heavy, the roads where completely covers with white powder, I was traveling at speeds around 50mph when I could, which is pretty fast for conditions, and Iowa motorist were passing me like it was a bright sunshiney day!!! And I'm not talking just SUV's and 4-Wheel Drives, I'm also talking about Ford Focus' and other small cars like that! I now realize why so many Iowa Idiots end up in the ditch!!! Because they are just that, Idiots!!!!
I probably push the speed a little too much sometimes in bad wheather, but I'm in a big truck, with a lot of weight on my back to hold the road with! These Iowa 4-wheeler's are light, easy to loose control, and not good for snowy conditions!!!
Tonight I was driving in the right lane going about 50mph while a small car was attempting to pass me on the left. Three cars were getting on from on ramp, but I couldn't get over thanks to the Idiot 4-wheeler to give them the lane, so I had to slow down. In the process, the lead car getting on from the on ramp, took the ramp too fast, did two 360* in front of me, ended up in the midean, and the Car attempting to pass me on the left joined him there!!!
I think I was dealing with bad roads for about 100 miles, and it seemed that there were at least two 4-wheelers off the road and in a ditch for every 1 mile traveled!!! And that is not much of an exajeration either! Bottom line, If you are a body shop repairman by trade, then Iowa is the place to work, because there is an awful lot of 4-wheelers going to need some work done to them!!!!

Moving On....

Was just listening to that song on my blog, so had to use it as my next blog title, LOL. Anyways, I've been sitting in Chicagoland now for 34 + Hrs, and yes, I'm ready to get moving on!!!!!!! This is the hardest part of this job!
It's not the long hours behind the wheel, driving threw every known wheather conditions, or road hazards; It's not the dropping and Hooking, or trying to find customers addresses while worrying about getting lost and ending up in non-truck friendly areas (which happens way to often, LOL); It's not trying to dispatch myself on the perfect loads, or trying to find a load to get home with; It's not even trying to drive threw New York City (allthough that would be a close second, LOL);
It is most deffinantely the long breaks away from home that are forced on me by DOT regulations!!!!! 34 hrs is a long time to be stuck in a truck doing nothing, but being bored! Can't figure out why the DOT would think that would be better for a driver than just working and running until we get home, while obeying the other log book rules such as the 11 hrs a day driving, and the 14 hrs a day consecutive on duty and/or driving. That is what is wrong with our government, and our country, too many laws, rules, and regulations that are stupid and useless!!!
Tomorrow morning I will get up after sitting for over 40 hrs to go pick up a load going to Lawrence, KS, and I am so ready to get Moving On!!!!

Tried By Fire...

Like a sword, that is put in the fire to get hot enough to mend into a perfect weapon, so is God putting me and my family through the fire to make us, well not the perfect weapon, but more in tune with his will!
One thing I have diffenately learned in the last 6 months of my life, is that without God leading the charge, you will only end up in defeat! For a long time, I was guilty of just that, trying to be in charge instead of Letting God be in charge and what did it get me????????
Let me see???? Almost divorced????? Bankrupt????? Almost in the grave due to health issues????? Emotionally Depressed worse than any other time in my life (including when I lost my first wife and son in car accident 12yrs ago)???????? Angry all the time????? No fun to be around????? and on and on and on........
But even though I was going threw one of the ruffest patches in my life over the last 6 months, God has used that to mend me into the perfect sword! Ok, lets be honest here, I'm far from being like a perfect sword, but you get the picture right?
I mean, He has taught me to once again lean on him for all my needs, and now that I have put him first, leaning on him for everything, and letting go, and Let God.... I see my life on the uphill swing once again! My depression has lifted, my marriage is on the mend, I'm no longer angry all the time, and my finances see a light at the end of the tunnel, and this time I don't think it's a train! (ha ha).
The point is, putting God first once again has put me on the road to recovery! Thank you Lord for saving my soul from my sins, and putting me on the right track again!!!!

An unexpected U-turn in Life....

For many years in my marriage, I heard from my wife how I was not plugging into our marriage enough. There would be nights I would come home and be so tired that I would just want to roll over and go to sleep, when I'm sure my wife wanted something more from me that night, such as compassion, and affection. I found myself at that time, to be more worried about what I wanted, such as video games, and anything that brought me intertainment, than being there for my wife when she needed me most. Usually I was there for my wife, but only at the times when I wanted to be. I've always loved being effectionate, but in the past, I chose the times to do just that around fulfilling my addiction, which mostly was to video games.
As a result of many years of being turned off to my Wife's needs, and worrying more about my own, she had enough and unplugged herself, which lead to a close encouter to divorce court for us a few months ago. Sadly, it took almost losing her to realize how much I needed her, and truly loved her. For far too long I was taking advantage of the fact that she would always be there for me, and when I wanted her, I would get what I wanted...
Well, since that ruff spot in our marriage, we have been slowly rebuilding our relationship to where it was before I became addicted to something other than her love. Guess I just have an addictive nature. Now I find myself addicted to her, and loving her more than I can stand sometimes. When I'm on the road, which is way too much, I find myself missing her more now than I ever did in the past! I guess a lot of that is due to the fact that I got to see what life would be like without her, and I didn't like it. I use to go out on the road, and I did miss her, but I always knew she would be there when I got home, and didn't think about not having her in my life then. But now, ??? I find myself constantly worried that I'm not good enough to keep her happy. And with all the problems we are having in just about every aspect of our live's, I'm worried that one day she will just be done with me and want to move on...
Part of this new worry is due to the U-turn in our live's. Before I was the one unplugged, and now she is the one unplugged. I mean, she love's me, she tells me all the right things, and is affectionate at times, but when I need her most, she just rolls over and goes to sleep, much like I did before. I realize she is been under a lot of stress with starting her new school, and is tired from putting in long days from babysitting and going to school at night, but for some reason, I can't help from thinking there is more to this unplugging she has done in our marriage.
I try to say my feelings, but they always come out wrong, and are misinterpreted as me just wanting sex, or something like that, but in reality, It's more about me wanting to be wanted again. Before she wanted me, and I knew it, and it gave me security in our relationship. I know, selfish of me to only worry about my security then, when all kinds of things must of been going through her head at those times, on to why I was not plugging into her.
Now, I am the one constantly worrying about why she has not plugged back into our marriage in this way. In every other way, everything seems to be okay, but when we are alone, I do not feel like she wants me anymore, and it makes me sad! She has a lot on her plate, and I'm trying to be patient and understanding, but I'm struggling with this U-turn in the road of our life. I love her more than anything, and need her always, but I am struggling with this change. Pray for me, that I may be patient, and understanding while she adjust to her knew schedule, and hopefully over a period of time, her love will grow strong for me again, and she will want me like she use too, and both of us will be plugged in, and our love will grow stronger than ever before!

Adventures of a Mad Truck driver...

Here are just a few photos I took while on the road. I made them into a short movie, so hope you enjoy! Figured it would be a nice way of sharing my adventures with whoever wanted to see.

Fugitive on the loose!!!

I am currently stuck in Fontana, Ca, where I'm letting my Log book catch up to me. In order to make sure I could get home to see my kids, Gaige and Chelsea, I had to become a fugitive, or at least a law breaker to make sure I could pick up a load that delivers close to home.
There is this thing called a 70hr log book rule that says you are not allowed to work more than 70hrs in a 7 day period. Well, if I would be a law abiding citizen, I would never make it home so I bended that rule just a little by working about 84hrs in a 7 day period in order to make sure I could get my homeward bound Load!
Now, I am stuck in Fontana, Ca waiting for the log book to catch up to me, witch will be about 10:30pm tonight. As soon as it does, I'm out of here, and homeward bound! I just hope no DOT officers stuble onto my blog. Yesterday, driving to Fontana from Torrance, CA, I saw a police chase happening on the other side of the freeway. I immediatly thought that they could be after me next if they only knew what I was doing. LOL. Seriously though, it is not something I will do very often, because if I got into any kind of accident, or DOT inspection, the fines would be astronomicle!!! Even if an accident was not my fault, if I was involved while running past the 70hr rule, I would go to Jail! No passing go, no collecting 200$$$!!! That would suck!

A Tribute to My Wife, Teresa...

Here is a little video I put together as an appreciation to my wife, who has to put up with a lot being married to a Truck Driving Man...

I've been everywhere, Man...

I finally have my pic's from my trip to the east cost downloaded on my computer, so I thought I would share them. That trip was actually last month, but pic's were on my phone, and I just figured out how to get them downloaded onto my PC. Hope you like....

Got to Love Monday's!!!

That's right, It's monday, and back to work. I often wonder why it seems Monday's are almost always challenging for us? Why does it seem things hardly ever go as planned on Monday's???
Maybe it's because it's the first day back to work after a refreshing weekend of no work. After recovering, maybe we just have more patients on Mondays to handle the adversatie? Then again, maybe not??? Who know's, but Monday's always seem to post some type of challenge.
Today Monday did not disappoint either! I was suppose to pick up my first load of the week in St. Joseph, MO today, which was suppose to be ready at Noon! Well, it is now 4:00PM in the afternoon, and my load is not ready yet!! In fact, I have been told that it will not be ready until 8:00pm tonight. Considering I got here to the customer at 10am this morning, I will wait for this load for 10 hrs!!!! That's right, Monday bites again!!!

Thursday Night Blues...

Well, Another day is down, and I will get to be home in less than two days! For the last month and a half I have spent way more time in this truck than I ever wanted to, but with God's will, I'm hoping this is the mark of getting my job back on track where I can be home on the weekends.

This morning I loaded in Port Arthur, Tx (See Pics) which was right off the water, and I could even watch them unload one of the vessels that was docked there. It was pretty cool! Allthough it was a nice view, I couldn't see the Gulf, but if I where to cross that bridge you see in one of those pics, I would of been able to see it, I was that close! I would say within in a mile or so. I did notice there was still a lot of damage visable from the latest hurricane that hit that area last year, but for the most part, it wasn't too bad.

Now I'm sitting in Jenks, OK where I delivered my Port Arthur load, and now just taking my break. In the morning I will pick up a pre-loaded trailer at Whirlpool, and deliver it to Dallas, TX right smack dab in the middle of downtown, or at least pretty darn close to it, YUCK! Oh well, it was a good paying load, and set the ending of my week up just right to get home. And home is my goal!!!

Back On the Road Again...

It is about 6:30pm, and I'm now sitting in Houston, TX waiting for my appointment time at a Kroger grocery wharehouse, which is not until 8:00pm.

I've included a few snap shots of my latest trip down here, where it is a cool 68* and feels good! From what I've been reading, the wheather everywhere in the USA is crazy right now! There talking of multiple highway closings in the west/ northwest, But not due to Ice, or snow! At least not due to Ice or Snow out of the sky. I'm reading that many highways in Washington, and Colorado are closed because warmer temps have made it very dangerous for avalanches in those areas! They even closed I-70 through Vail, CO for this very reason.

Never heard of roads being closed for avalanches, at least not major interstate. I plan on calling it a night tonight in Port Arthur, TX, where my next load comes out of. Hope to get a few more snap shots of the land there, because it's right on the coast line of the Gulf of Mexico! Should be pretty!

34 Hour Break!

Ok, what is so important about 34 HR break? If I take a full 34 hrs off in a row, I get to restart my log book hours at 0! That means I have 70 fresh hours to run!
The best thing about my latest 34hr break is that I got to take it at home! I delivered a load to Harrisonville, MO Sunday night, and got to come home for the break. I did have to push my log book Sunday to make it here for that break, but I wasn't going to be denied!
Sunday I drove over 800 miles to get home, and legally the most I can log in a day is about 730. That is if all states I run through would allow me to drive 70mph or faster, otherwise that total goes down. The load I delivered came from Pennington, AL and I was told it was only about 682 mile drive. Well, there was no route that could get me there in that short of miles, but because they said it could be done in 682 miles, that's what I showed on the log book. Just a little fudging, but hey, you do what you got to do in order to spend some time with the one's you love!
Sadly, my break is now up, and I'm about to take out on another adventure, picking up my next load in St. Joseph, MO and Delivering to Jenks, OK. I plan on being back home for the weekend, but $$$ will decide if that gets to hapen or not...

Living on PB & J

I remember back when I was in the Marine Corps, at the ripe old age of 20, I was on deployment to Yuma, AZ and ran out of money a week before I got paid again. With my last 5 dollars, I went to the commissary and bought a loaf of bread, some Peanut butter, and some Jelly, and made that stretch for five whole days! Wasn't easy, but when you don't have any money, you do what you got to do.
Now, that I'm on the road so much, I'm finding out that the cost of living on the road is more than it use to be. Now, just about every time I stop to eat, it cost me about 7 to 8 dollars, and in some cases, even more! If you do the math on that, If I only ate twice a day, I would spend an estimated 112$ a week at 8 bucks a meal, twice a day. And that don't even count any extra stops for drinks or other snacks.
So how am I going to try and counter this expense problem?

PB & J!!!

That's right, if I was able to make it a whole week when I was in the military, I figure I could at least save myself a few meals by making me a PB & J sandwich at least once a day, leaving me only to have to buy 1 meal a day. If I can pull this off, I should save over 50$ a week! Wish me luck on my new PB & J diet!

Settling In for a long Break...

The sad thing is, I don't want a long break, I'd rather keep moving, but the Log book rules shut me down early today, and waiting for Midnight to roll around so I can move again. Actually, I won't be going anywhere until 7am, so I'll get a good night's rest.
Right now I am at Brookhaven, MS, where I've been since about 2pm this afternoon. Unfortunately, I had to get a new tire on my truck today because I picked up a nail somewhere, and had one go flat on me. Normally you can get a tire like this patched for about 25 bucks, but my tire was worn out, and had less than the legal tread depth left, so I went ahead and had the truck stop put on a used tire that still had pretty good tread depth on it. It's actually now the best tire on my truck, even though it was used. It is a Michelin, which are the most expensive tires you can buy for a big truck. This one used cost me 180$ plus mounting and tax, which came up to 224.50.
This is one of those bad things about owning your own equipment, when it breaks, you pay!

Six Days on the Road...

Ok, It's only been 5 days, but by the time anyone reads this, it will probably be at least 6, LOL.

I'm going to try and share more about my trips, to keep all of you who read boring me informed of where I am, and where I've been.

This trip has taken me south out of the Cleveland area, and down to the swamp lands of Louisiana. Right Now I'm sitting in a Casino truck stop in Opelousas, LA, where my load delivered. Here are a few Pictures of my Trip at the top.

This trip took me threw Cities such as: Columbus, OH, Cincinatti, OH, Louisville, KY, Nashville, TN, Memphis, TN, Jackson, MS, Just north of New Orleans, LA, Baton Rouge, LA, and ending in Opelousas, where I sit tonight.

Tomorrow is a new day, but I only have 3 1/2 Hours left on log book to drive, so it will be a boring day, as I pick up 12 hours after midnight, but not until then.

The Load I'm getting tomorrow is only a 218 mile load that delivers at 10am on Saturday in Hattiesburg, MS. It will be there that I will take a 34 Hour break to restart my Log book.

For those interested readers who do not know the Log book rules, I'm only allowed to work 70 hours in 7 days, I can drive up to 11 hours a day, and cannot work more than 14 hours consecutively. That means I can only use about 3 hrs a day for any breaks, or on duty work that is not driving if I want to get a full 11 hrs in of driving. Is any of this making sense??? Doesn't make sense to me either, but oh well, Schneider makes sure I abide by them!

Happy New Year!

2008 is now in the past, the memories from it will forever last.
Memories of the bad times, and of the good; The lessons from 08 should be understood.
Lessons of the good times when life was at it's best!, Lessons of the hard times when love is put to the test!
Rather it be lessons of Relationships, Employment, School, or other, In 09, these lessons over our hearts must cover!
The new year will bring it's own challenges for us to rise above, but with the lessons of yester-year, we will be able to sore high above these challenges in the sky, like a dove!
So when 2009 brings on a new challenge that leads you to fear, Fear not, and remember the lessons so you will indeed have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!